IF I WERE IN CHARGE THE RULES WOULD BE DIFFERENT!

Proimos’s (The Many Adventures of Johnny Mutton, not reviewed, etc.) poetry packs a wacky punch. In a debut collection, he offers over 60 works, addressing such subjects as siblings and parents, friends and enemies, homework, food, and pets. From musical ditties like “Lola, the Singing Octopus” (“I’m in love with Lola the Octopus / and the angelic way she sings. / Oh, how I wish I could marry her / but who can afford eight rings?”) to the oddball odyssey of “Paul Carolina Flushed Himself to China,” Proimos has something for everyone. In the titular poem, a big-mouthed boy imagines turning the tables on his meddling mom: “It hurts me to lecture you, Mommy, / but you didn’t eat all your salami. / Plus your room is way too neat / and you have socks on both your feet. . . . Oh, after all you’ve put me through, what am I gonna do with you? . . .” Proimos’s Dav Pilkey–esque black-and-white illustrations accompany each. One funny vignette for “A Poem About My Uncle Larry (Who Never Wore A Suit) and His Wedding” shows an unbelieving bride wincing at her bathing-suit-wearing bridegroom. Sure to inspire laughter, this rib-tickling read-aloud may also get kids writing. As Proimos says in “Surprise, Surprise”—the collections final verse—“If you want another poem / the writing’s up to you.” (Poetry. 5-10)