BARELY VISIBLE

A mother comes to terms with her son’s mostly hidden disability in Somers’ memoir.

In utero, the author’s first baby was diagnosed with a rare chromosomal mutation that would cause a host of grave physical impairments and deformities. Somers made the difficult decision to terminate the pregnancy. The second attempt appeared perfectly “normal.” The author’s baby son Jack slept through the night at four months old, learned to walk at the usual age, and easily adjusted to daycare. But warning signs appeared: Sometimes, especially in public, Jack behaved inappropriately, throwing objects or hitting people. He developed deep obsessions with a series of objects—pots and pans, purses, watches, sports cards—only to abruptly lose interest and move on. In Kindergarten, a school psychologist described Jack as delayed in social and gross motor skills. Somers’ personal life changed—after divorcing Jack’s father, the author’s subsequent relationships faltered when her new partners struggled to adjust to life with Jack. As Jack grew up, some aspects of his life improved. He was good-looking, excelled at baseball, and loved drafting fantasy sports teams on his phone. Yet his difficulties continued as he failed classes and made few lasting friendships. Somers’ story moves swiftly, keeping pace with her son’s mercurial nature, and Jack comes vividly to life in the author’s use of dialogue (he describes most people as “weirdos” or “idiots,” but not maliciously). The author finds humor in situations that would make most parents cringe: As a camp counselor, Jack taught the kids to “arm fart” and play “knockout.” Finally learning to ride a bike, he mowed over a pedestrian in his path, “walloping that woman in the ass with his handlebar as he sailed right past her.” Somers examines herself honestly and unsparingly, as well. (She initially resisted accepting the Asperger’s syndrome diagnosis for Jack and at times lost faith in him.) Learning about herself helped, as Somers realized that Jack in many ways mirrors her own traits of anxiety, impulsiveness, and perfectionism, and that both of them do the best they can within their own sets of limitations.

A reflective and humorous journey that should resonate with any parent.