Frizzy-haired, knobby-kneed Ruskin Splinter, age nine, believes himself eminently suited to play the lead—a hero capable of slaying dragons—in St. George's school play. The teacher, however, fearing repercussions, gives the part to the Lizard Street bully, Elvis, who regularly terrorizes the neighbors and goes unpunished; Ruskin's mother says only ``polly- wolly-doodle-all-the-day,'' while his father's lines are ``It's not my fault'' and ``Don't interfere.'' But when Ruskin takes on a toast-eating crocodile found in the sewer, others begin to see him as the noble soul he truly is; even Elvis becomes docile. With tongue in cheek, Ridley pens this light comedy from a distinctly half-pint point-of-view: all the adults but one are completely ineffectual, while only a child can right long- standing wrongs. Blithe and quick, the book could be accused of offering simplistic solutions to problems like unemployment and bullies, as well as crocodile fighting; humor, clearly, would be its winning defense. (Fiction. 8-12)