A resonant account of self-discovery and spiritual fulfillment.
West reflects on her spiritual and personal journey in this memoir.
The book’s opening scene takes readers into the kitchen of West’s childhood home in a Midwestern suburb as the family prepares to decorate their Christmas tree. Throughout this scene, the author reflects on the ways the holiday story exemplifies each family member’s role. Mom “was always there,” she writes, highlighting her mother’s stabilizing presence in maintaining daily routines and household chores. Alternately, “Dad was more fun but inconstant; you never knew if he would make you laugh or cry.” This opening anecdote, which uses a simple event to make profound psychological and spiritual observations, is typical of the book. The follow-up to her 2020 memoir of family healing, Rootlines, here West focuses on her lifelong quest for meaning. Raised in a devoutly Catholic home, she embraced her family’s religion (e.g., she recalls praying for her drunk father as a young girl). Moving to California in the 1960s, where she studied science at the University of California, Berkeley, the author joined the throngs of baby boomers who found purpose in practicing Eastern spirituality and experimenting with drugs. Still, there remained constant tension between her interest in mantra repetition and other Eastern practices and her academic pursuit of science. As she entered a career in the nascent Silicon Valley, however, she fell victim to her family’s generational struggle with alcohol, diminishing her energy for exploration.
In her raw, intimate work, West examines her own complex internal struggles. When she first attended Alcoholics Anonymous, for example, she recalls her initial recoil at the program’s emphasis on relying on God, telling herself, “I didn’t come here to learn that I’m powerless.” She sought a more empirical, scientific approach toward overcoming addiction. As the book progresses, West outlines her own eclectic brand of spirituality, one that emerged from the myriad experiences that have defined her life. Coming to terms with her own sexuality and accepting herself as a lesbian during the height of antiqueer sentiment in 1970s-era California is another of the book’s central themes. “I finally had to admit,” she writes after breaking away from a ménage à trois that involved a man, “I was as gay as springtime. The time had come to admit it.” She realized that coming out publicly was important both as an act of self-empowerment and a political act—to show that queer men and women existed everywhere. The memoir also serves as a self-help guide; West clearly hopes to reach out to readers who struggle with addiction or are on their own spiritual journeys. To this end, she includes an ample assortment of questions designed for individual reflection or small group discussion. The book is at times repetitive and could use tighter editing, though its occasionally meandering narrative parallels the author’s own spiritual journey. Whether writing about the death of her sister, coming to terms with her sexual orientation, or contemplating the dichotomy between science and religion, West blends sage insights with deeply personal and engaging storytelling.
A resonant account of self-discovery and spiritual fulfillment.Pub Date: Jan. 14, 2025
ISBN: 9781647428228
Page Count: 352
Publisher: She Writes Press
Review Posted Online: Dec. 18, 2024
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
BOOK REVIEW
Some of Avant’s mantras are overstated, but her book is magnanimous, inspiring, and relentlessly optimistic.
Memories and life lessons inspired by the author’s mother, who was murdered in 2021.
“Neither my mother nor I knew that her last text to me would be the words ‘Think you’ll be happy,’ ” Avant writes, "but it is fitting that she left me with a mantra for resiliency.” The author, a filmmaker and former U.S. Ambassador to the Bahamas, begins her first book on the night she learned her mother, Jacqueline Avant, had been fatally shot during a home invasion. “One of my first thoughts,” she writes, “was, ‘Oh God, please don’t let me hate this man. Give me the strength not to hate him.’ ” Daughter of Clarence Avant, known as the “Black Godfather” due to his work as a pioneering music executive, the author describes growing up “in a house that had a revolving door of famous people,” from Ella Fitzgerald to Muhammad Ali. “I don’t take for granted anything I have achieved in my life as a Black American woman,” writes Avant. “And I recognize my unique upbringing…..I was taught to honor our past and pay forward our fruits.” The book, which is occasionally repetitive, includes tributes to her mother from figures like Oprah Winfrey and Bill Clinton, but the narrative core is the author’s direct, faith-based, unwaveringly positive messages to readers—e.g., “I don’t want to carry the sadness and anger I have toward the man who did this to my mother…so I’m worshiping God amid the worst storm imaginable”; "Success and feeling good are contagious. I’m all about positive contagious vibrations!” Avant frequently quotes Bible verses, and the bulk of the text reflects the spirit of her daily prayer “that everything is in divine order.” Imploring readers to practice proactive behavior, she writes, “We have to always find the blessing, to be the blessing.”
Some of Avant’s mantras are overstated, but her book is magnanimous, inspiring, and relentlessly optimistic.Pub Date: Oct. 17, 2023
ISBN: 9780063304413
Page Count: 288
Publisher: HarperOne
Review Posted Online: Aug. 17, 2023
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 15, 2023
The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.
The former iCarly star reflects on her difficult childhood.
In her debut memoir, titled after her 2020 one-woman show, singer and actor McCurdy (b. 1992) reveals the raw details of what she describes as years of emotional abuse at the hands of her demanding, emotionally unstable stage mom, Debra. Born in Los Angeles, the author, along with three older brothers, grew up in a home controlled by her mother. When McCurdy was 3, her mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. Though she initially survived, the disease’s recurrence would ultimately take her life when the author was 21. McCurdy candidly reconstructs those in-between years, showing how “my mom emotionally, mentally, and physically abused me in ways that will forever impact me.” Insistent on molding her only daughter into “Mommy’s little actress,” Debra shuffled her to auditions beginning at age 6. As she matured and starting booking acting gigs, McCurdy remained “desperate to impress Mom,” while Debra became increasingly obsessive about her daughter’s physical appearance. She tinted her daughter’s eyelashes, whitened her teeth, enforced a tightly monitored regimen of “calorie restriction,” and performed regular genital exams on her as a teenager. Eventually, the author grew understandably resentful and tried to distance herself from her mother. As a young celebrity, however, McCurdy became vulnerable to eating disorders, alcohol addiction, self-loathing, and unstable relationships. Throughout the book, she honestly portrays Debra’s cruel perfectionist personality and abusive behavior patterns, showing a woman who could get enraged by everything from crooked eyeliner to spilled milk. At the same time, McCurdy exhibits compassion for her deeply flawed mother. Late in the book, she shares a crushing secret her father revealed to her as an adult. While McCurdy didn’t emerge from her childhood unscathed, she’s managed to spin her harrowing experience into a sold-out stage act and achieve a form of catharsis that puts her mind, body, and acting career at peace.
The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.Pub Date: Aug. 9, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-982185-82-4
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: May 30, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2022
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
© Copyright 2025 Kirkus Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Follow
Popular in this Genre
We can’t wait for you to join Kirkus!
It’s free and takes less than 10 seconds!
Already have an account? Log in.
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
Welcome Back!
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
