THE EMPTY BOWL

West reflects on her spiritual and personal journey in this memoir.

The book’s opening scene takes readers into the kitchen of West’s childhood home in a Midwestern suburb as the family prepares to decorate their Christmas tree. Throughout this scene, the author reflects on the ways the holiday story exemplifies each family member’s role. Mom “was always there,” she writes, highlighting her mother’s stabilizing presence in maintaining daily routines and household chores. Alternately, “Dad was more fun but inconstant; you never knew if he would make you laugh or cry.” This opening anecdote, which uses a simple event to make profound psychological and spiritual observations, is typical of the book. The follow-up to her 2020 memoir of family healing, Rootlines, here West focuses on her lifelong quest for meaning. Raised in a devoutly Catholic home, she embraced her family’s religion (e.g., she recalls praying for her drunk father as a young girl). Moving to California in the 1960s, where she studied science at the University of California, Berkeley, the author joined the throngs of baby boomers who found purpose in practicing Eastern spirituality and experimenting with drugs. Still, there remained constant tension between her interest in mantra repetition and other Eastern practices and her academic pursuit of science. As she entered a career in the nascent Silicon Valley, however, she fell victim to her family’s generational struggle with alcohol, diminishing her energy for exploration.

In her raw, intimate work, West examines her own complex internal struggles. When she first attended Alcoholics Anonymous, for example, she recalls her initial recoil at the program’s emphasis on relying on God, telling herself, “I didn’t come here to learn that I’m powerless.” She sought a more empirical, scientific approach toward overcoming addiction. As the book progresses, West outlines her own eclectic brand of spirituality, one that emerged from the myriad experiences that have defined her life. Coming to terms with her own sexuality and accepting herself as a lesbian during the height of antiqueer sentiment in 1970s-era California is another of the book’s central themes. “I finally had to admit,” she writes after breaking away from a ménage à trois that involved a man, “I was as gay as springtime. The time had come to admit it.” She realized that coming out publicly was important both as an act of self-empowerment and a political act—to show that queer men and women existed everywhere. The memoir also serves as a self-help guide; West clearly hopes to reach out to readers who struggle with addiction or are on their own spiritual journeys. To this end, she includes an ample assortment of questions designed for individual reflection or small group discussion. The book is at times repetitive and could use tighter editing, though its occasionally meandering narrative parallels the author’s own spiritual journey. Whether writing about the death of her sister, coming to terms with her sexual orientation, or contemplating the dichotomy between science and religion, West blends sage insights with deeply personal and engaging storytelling.

A resonant account of self-discovery and spiritual fulfillment.